Honestly, I have always believed love should be simpler. We give love, we receive love. Simple, right? But in practice, in this society, it doesn't seem to work that way; many people are wanting to fill in their gaps without admitting to their need, willing to steal what would be freely given.

I have always approached person-to-person love naively, expecting only the best, seeing others' potentials. Not in a looking-to-change-people kind of way, rather in coming to relationships with an understanding of my own faults and foibles and with a desire to better myself, I have sought to leave room for others' intentions to grow . But I have often done it unwisely and it has hurt me. And I have to say it has hurt others, too.

Naivete.

But everything is a process, right? I'm learning! Better judgment all the time.

Just a comment that life is good. I'm grateful that things are not quite so up-and-down anymore -- still fun, still exciting, still bumpy, but not so crazy, not so dizzying or gripping. I am becoming happy in the deepest and bestest way. ;-)

Back from India and have finally actually returned (sometime during these last few weeks). Thinking a lot about the concept (and feeling) of Home -- something I'm not very familiar with but need for myself and my girl. A stronger sense of continuity, stability, security, without lapsing into the rut of expectation and routine/ everyday demands. A fine line, but workable with some consideration and passion, I suspect. Then, there's another fine line: passionate living as carried out without attachment/desire. Hmm.

Working hard at finishing school and already having to think about the next step! I don't mind looking ahead, just as long as there's space to be here now, too. That's the kinda thing you have to create, though, that space. Otherwise, between caring for my littl'un and for myself, and getting stuff done (well) at school, there would be nothing left.

I've reflected a lot lately about the fact that it is really good to be part of this community. Really I need to make time to involve myself more, make some more friends here, learn more about people doing good in the world. It's just nice to know that so many folks are dedicated to making positive change because, really, who wants to feel alone? Solitude, yes, loneliness, no.

Anyway, always looking for ways to give and to appreciate; I've been seeking wildly creative ways to incorporate Gaia-kinda wisdom into projects for school -- public space intervention installation, GIS work, etc. If you have ideas, I'd be excited to hear about them!

With a great big smile,
Misty

My, my, my...Ain't life grand!

Such good stuff, loving India, not much time for this or that because of this and that.

Returning to this site is such a delight! Being on zaadz is so inspiring, so refreshing!!!! Thank you to all of you wonders!

I am still in India, will be here until 1 Jan. That brings mixed feelings...it's been a wild time here -- just a study abroad, but a hell of a trip! Check it out at my trip blog: http://nandminindia.wordpress.com -- but that site's password-protected (hearkening back to my internet paranoia, which has relaxed quite a bit...much like myself :-) so ask me if you're interested! I'll look forward to hearing from you!

If anyone knows of a great thing to do in New York City for 10 hours after about 20 hours of international travel (until our nighttime flight back home), could you let me know? It's weird timing I'm stuck in...

Take care!

I am excited to be here, though trying to get through my trepidation over doing this online interaction thing. Wow, how old and weird that sounds...probably it's because I'm a geographer and a strong earth sign -- very dedicated (more than I'd like sometimes) to the tangible and 'solid.'

Anyway, I am definitely a seeker. Of truth, justice, and a world-citizen way! Way into loving Life and Love and Life, doing great things in/for our world (physically and psychically), and exploring...which is why I'm here. Always trying to expand and improve, always excited about adventure.

I dig word play and concise poetry. I believe in paradoxes though I love consistency, and I want to be simple but oftentimes my mind is just too open for that. Or maybe not open enough, who knows?

Not so sure about society, though I could go on and on about culture -- my love for it and whether it actually exists or not. I do love the idea of community and am always interested in exploring how it's played out, how it changes, how it's not really an 'it' and so on...

Thinking that the *zaadz community is really cool and looking for help on getting myself involved and finding out if I can make actual friends online. (Do you really make friends in virtual reality??)

Whew. Who's got time to work? (haha) Spending time helping out in my little girl's classroom, working with a couple of her classmates to try and help them envision a different life for themselves than their role models at home are able to provide, helping my friend who's just had her 3rd and 4th babies (yowsa!), sorting things out for India, applying for scholarships (etc.), caning some chairs for a professor, managing home life, focusing on my daughter, reading/preparing for travels, keeping in touch with friends, trying to set up my service project, making and keeping doc appts...whew! Where does work fit in??? And yet, so necessary.

Anybody know of a good daytime-hours summer job? I'll just have to squeeze in the rest of life around the edges, I suppose, just like most everyone else...Life doesn't have to be that way, I am certain. What I'm not certain of is how, exactly, that works.

Grant me courage and wisdom to follow (forge) my own path, to find success on my own terms, and to really enjoy life along the way!

Grappling with ways to be effective as an encourager and promoter of change...

Working toward a greater goal (making positive change) and opening myself up to possibilities toward that -- is this good enough? Should I not perhaps consider a very specific way to do this, apart from planning work with extant NGO's and advocacy groups? Like Paul Farmer, who has brilliantly plied his medical trade toward huge impact on global and national scales (see Mountains Beyond Mountains, his biography by Tracy Kidder). Like Wade Davis, National Geographic Explorer-in-Residence, who has spent his life not only exploring and cataloging the world, but also helping to conserve both environmentally and culturally.

These are amazing role models...but how do I get there from here? I worry because there's no going back to age 18; I certainly don't think my time has passed, but what are the possibilities for prime effectiveness from this, my unique juncture in space and time? I want so desperately to do GREAT things (wish I'd done it sooner!) and specificity may be key at this point. And, of course I'm not thinking specialization, per se, because that's overdone by Westerners, in my opinion (de-emphasizing gorgeous interconnectivity)...more along the lines of clarity and initial focus upon a particular facet of possible action. Typical: more specific, Misty!

Being one's best ain't easy. At least, not yet!

Grateful.

Life is so good, let's not waste precious energy wishing it were better! I find it so easy to forget that this moment is all I have...

I love right now.

-Misty

Well, I labor over this online presence thing, having had fairly minimal outward exposure on the internet. How much to share/not share? What's interesting, how best to convey myself...probably what everyone initially thinks about.

At any rate, I figure I'd better get started because I'm planning to keep a blog when I go to India later this year. The idea is to offer up a semester (or perhaps a year) of updates and adventure stories, coupled with photos and whatever I can scrounge up; I want to share these with kids in [our impoverished] local schools and follow up with presentations when we (my daughter and I) return.

The plan would be not only to augment any social studies/geography work kids are doing, but also to help broaden their horizons - their dreamscapes - in a really tangible, accessible kind of way. I really hope to encourage people, particularly young 'uns, to think more in terms of being global citizens with a strong sense of connection, and attendant responsibility and curiosity. I'm very excited about this plan! (And to think it all began with a scholarship service proposal...) So this will be a trial run for that...getting used to blogging.

So, yay! Here I am World!!! Tell me how you are! What amazing things are you doing??

Hmm. Well, even if you don't answer, World, I'll be back to say more soon. Take care!

With Love,
Misty